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why can't i explain why i like someone

So how do we tame our need to revolt, especially when it has to do with our safety and those around us? Weve all had moments when we were at a loss for words to describe how we were feeling. In fact, it can help all of us talk about the ideas, concepts, inventions and people that interest us. Why you keep overexplaining yourself and how to stop - Mic DBT worksheets and dialectical behavior therapy skills. 11 Tips to Support Someone Struggling with Mental Health. Theres no fully successful therapy that I know of for alexithymia, Grafman says. These included things like learning to be mindful of my emotions and writing in a journal.. Isolation. It's a mysterious package, delivered by subtle sensory clues. There are plenty of common causes for a bad mood, but when do your mood swings have a more serious underlying cause? Will failing to voice that information result in your team moving forward incorrectly on a project? Among alexithymias primary features are a lack of emotional awareness, an inability to identify or describe your feelings and trouble distinguishing between emotions and bodily sensations. (2021). Yang Q, et al. You may feel tempted to explain every single thing you know about this particular work, telling her about the artists life and career, the materials and techniques used, the movement that the artist is part of, and so on. You may experience depression symptoms at night more than during the day. In the end, its not really what happened that your boss or your team will care aboutits how you react to it that matters. Now what? Thats the opposite of how it should be, experts say. But there's more going on behind the scenes. Are you new to dating or just looking to improve your game? The more you can communicate your enthusiasm to others, the more likely they are to feel that way too. But, sometimes you find yourself in situations where providing reasoning is absolutely justifiedyet, youre unsure how to offer it without it sounding like youre trying to sneak away from any blame. (2021). Over the years, it has come to be understood as both a cognitive and an emotional issue. Cleveland Clinic 1995-2023. The server decided to let your bar expire slightly earlier before the discovery, then the Striker's bar still had some time after, according to the server. Give them some space, but let them know that you still want to be friends. Over the years, it has taken a lot of hard work to manage my alexithymia, Miller says. If you dont have the urge to touch them or be close to them, its a good sign that you dont really like them. When you talk about depression and it doesnt go as well as youd hoped, it can create some distance between you and the people you care about. Alexithymia, which translates to "no words for emotions," is a condition characterized by an inability to recognize, identify and describe emotions. A 2015 study published in the journal Drug and Alcohol Dependence found that people with alexithymia who had a cocaine habit benefited from computer-based cognitive behavioral therapy, possibly because it reduces demands on their interpersonal skills. Why We Can Get Obsessed With People Who Don't Want Us If the only thing you can think about is their body, you might just be having feelings of lust, which will fade after a while. Can Beetroot Powder Improve Athletic Performance? Talking about depression during interactions with GPs: A qualitative study exploring older peoples accounts of their depression narratives. When you communicate something simple to a colleague, such as Ill be leaving work early today, they could hear it in one of many different ways, depending on what motivates them. Watch NEWSMAX LIVE for the latest news and analysis on today's top stories, right here on Facebook. How you explain it with words, art, or some other form of expression is a matter of personal choice. Changing negative first impressions is difficult. Youre having a chat with someone, and theyre telling you something about a subject theyre very interested in or they know a lot about, and youre following along. But, if you want to make sure your true intention has been communicated and that you dont get known as selfish, needy, bossy or hedonistic (to name just four distinct possibilities) you need to check what they actually heard and how they interpreted it. Remember that little things can be important. After all, there can be gradients of alexithymia, from mild to severe. Using the example from above, this could look something like, Im sorry Im a day late in submitting this report. There is some evidence that people with alexithymia do better with more cognitive-based treatments in a computerized setting. Letting your ego takeover is a fast track to sabotaging your job and relationships with your boss or coworkers. It also can help to write about your feelings in a journal and try to glean meanings from them by using phrases such as I have learned that or I now realize that Doing this will help you expand your emotional vocabulary of words to express your feelings. If you think role playing might help you clarify your feelings, prepare yourself, or build your confidence, Rosmarin recommends practicing with a professional rather than a friend. 'Tenet' Explained, For Real This Time | GQ "Why" Should Just Be Automatic. 5. wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Communicating effectively means not only taking responsibility for what you say but also for how you are being heard. 272. r/iphone. Why is it so hard to talk about depression? But with our partner it was different, and I just couldn't explain it. Mention how, much like Jackson Pollock would drip paint, Frankenthaler would stain her canvases. Last Updated: July 24, 2023 Grafman is the director of brain injury research at the Shirley Ryan AbilityLab in Chicago. This can help your friend start to appreciate it. We often wrongly assume that introverts dont like people. You just met The One or maybe a shady character. If you need help coping with depression, a lifeline may be the best option: For help finding a therapist or support group, consider one of these search tools: If you think you might need more than therapy, explore this resource guide. Since other peoples perceptions of you can become your reputation very quickly, you may want to take responsibility not only for how you communicate but also for how what you say is perceived by your listener. ago You can explain why things are good but not why you like them. Use The Muse to find a job at a company with a culture you love. Now we get to true pain and politics. Your mother, in her rose-tinted shades, might see your shirt as pink. Kat is a Midwest-based freelance writer, covering topics related to careers, productivity, and the freelance life. Exhaustion. Instead, they make choices based on ego and strong emotions, which often lead to self-sabotage or unsafe behavior. There's no doubt about the contagious nature of bacterial or viral. Reasons You're Attracted to Someone, According to Biology - Insider Simply by being aware that everyone (including you) is unconsciously listening through a powerfully distorting filter, you will be much better prepared to make certain you are not misunderstood within the echo chamber of their needs. Its your brains reaction when you feel a threat to your freedom or think your choices are being limited. Focusing on breathing and taking care of your body through massage and muscle rolling can have important health benefits. Depression often makes people want to withdraw. Method 1 Recognizing Signs of a Crush 1 Determine if you leave a date with them feeling happy. If your feelings are too overwhelming to share, use printed materials or online teaching tools from such organizations as the American Psychiatric Association or the Anxiety and Depression Association of America. Walliman has made this a speciality he writes childrens books and makes YouTube videos about quantum physics, nanotechnology, relativity, rocket science and other traditionally dense topics and hes come up with four principles that can help you effectively communicate complex concepts. Surely they are the same. Dispelling One Myth of Courtship Behavior, How to Create a More Introvert-Friendly Work Culture, 10 Signs Your Baby (or Toddler) Is an Introvert, 2 Tips to Help You Make Friends as an Adult, 5 Confident Conversational Skills for Introverts, Do's and Don'ts for Living as an Introvert, Why Socializing Drains Introverts More Than Extroverts, 5 Essential Tips for Introvert-Extrovert Couples. Have you ever met someone for the first time and thought, I dont like you, and I dont know why? The answer could be simple as you are an introvert and the person you just met is an extrovert. Additionally, once a first impression is formed, people are less likely to change their minds due to the psychological principle of consistency. If youre less comfortable talking about your feelings, opening up about depression might feel unnatural for you. Try to avoid getting upset with your friend if they tell you something unpleasant that you might not want to hear. I Don't Like You, and I Don't Know Why | Psychology Today Think about what its going to be like if they dont.. When they have a negative reaction, thinking their freedom is in question, theyve learned to take a step back, pause for a moment and determine whats really important about the situation. The differences in their worldviews can cause social discomfort. In fact, I feel like the more I like something the less I talk about it, be it food or fictional characters (yes, I'm a weeb). Contrary to popular belief, women initiate courtship rituals. If you have had problems with jealousy in the past or you feel like your anger is out of control, consider learning how to. This response can . You can explain things that you love about them, as you said, and you can explain how they make you feel, but the love itself just is. You dont necessarily need words to explain depression. For more information regarding how to build and maintain human relationships, refer to The Like Switch. This response can make you feel annoyed, panicked or angry when rules or guidelines are put in place. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC. A behavioral therapist explains how we can keep our ego from causing harm to ourselves and others. Rather than living from your ego, you learn to balance whats best for you and those around you, even when it might not be convenient, but its the right thing to do. If you can't avoid your triggers, find ways to cope with them. Don't end a friendship with someone if you decide you dont want to date them. Its a cycle. Energy is the fuel that drives the vehicle of your body and focus is the direction your vehicle takes. If you think the person is acting this way due to something happening in their life, it may be best to ignore the behavior and hope things get better soon. A major difference between making friends as a kid versus an adult is spontaneity. Romantic, familial, platonic, what have you, all forms of love are welcome to be talked about here! Cognitive effects. Studies have shown that not only can getting COVID-19 increase your risk of experiencing depression, so can pandemic isolation. (Were even being told not to hug grandma or get-together for the holidays!). A 2021 study published in the Clinical Practice & Epidemiology in Mental Health found that people with alexithymia are more likely to develop medically unexplained physical symptoms, such as general fatigue, headache and indigestion than others are. Its always better to err on the side of caution.. Do you often feel as though, no matter how clearly you think youre communicating, your needs and motives get misinterpreted? And if its the latter, he adds, the more you can convey that to someone, the more likely they are to remember it and get some value from it., So, ask yourself: Why do I think this subject is so cool?. Reno. People will have trouble understanding why you stayed after the . What kind of natural scene could be conveyed with those colors in those configurations? Why Introverts Excel at Building Professional Relationships. As humans, we crave independence and autonomy. Make a short sentence that says what each piece is or . Prefacing your explanation with things like, I dont want to sound like Im making excuses, but or even a seemingly innocent, Just so you know ultimately send the wrong message. We would like to show you a description here but the site won't allow us. Exhaustion. Depression: Why to talk? Knowing your own symptoms can help you explain them to people who care about you. Without subsequent meetings, the person who has been judged negatively does not have an opportunity to change the mind of the person who judged them. Introverts may view extroverts as arrogant, overconfident, brash, and pushy. How to Explain Why You Love Someone | LoveToKnow They can progress through the treatment modules at their own pace and comfort level and not have to focus on feelings they dont understand.". If you don't really think of them throughout the day, you might just be spending time with them when you're feeling lonely. How does depression affect my relationships? George Bernard Shaw put it like this: The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.. But I don't have any calls ongoing. Our trained team of editors and researchers validate articles for accuracy and comprehensiveness. It's not yet identifiable. Then, at some stage you realize you kind of lost the thread of what theyre saying You realize you have absolutely no idea what theyre talking about.. Learn the differences between stress and anxiety, including their causes, symptoms and treatments. Introverts are less likely to outwardly express their feelings. How to Manage Anxiety and Flashbacks. Its good to be aware of that.. In the long run, youre saving time and effort for the both of you. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. When the pent-up frustration reaches a certain point, the frustrated introvert may explode with a litany of past transgressions. Is that dyslexia? everyone in your life is listening to you through a powerful filter (the filter of their own needs) which transmutes what they hear. Wait, what? youre likely thinking to yourself now, with a repulsed look on your face, Apologize? Ask a question or start a conversation about (almost) anything you desire. If you feel a thrill whenever their name pops up on your phone screen, you probably genuinely like them. Either way, explaining depression creatively isnt just a communication strategy. % of people told us that this article helped them. and our Then, ask your friend to look at the painting as if it were a landscape. What's more, people with alexithymia have a higher tendency to report unusual physical symptoms. The person with depression is not usually the best person to have to explain it, Dr. Rosmarin says. This is because everyone in your life is listening to you through a powerful filter (the filter of their own needs) which transmutes what they hear. However, they are listening to us through filters which are more powerful than any sunglasses. Change is resisted because it can hurt. Policy. The best . Its hard enough to explain depression when youre firing on all cylinders. Letting your listener know what is behind your action or request will make it less likely that they will layer their own (incorrect) interpretation. How do you react when your freedom seems threatened or your choices are being limited? This article is based on reporting that features expert sources. As a result, its important to ask a friend to help you understand your own emotions or other people. Does your ego take over or can you work through your feelings to understand why youre being asked to do something? The signs are there just a few months from birth. Your experience with depression is valid and unique. It also offers ideas for getting support in the midst of depression. Your alarm didnt go off. Emotions are signposts for things we care about, so ask yourself, What is this emotion trying to tell me? she adds. Try to explain without becoming angry, judgmental, or aggressive, Rosmarin advises. Having awareness that youre not doing this as well as you could and reaching out for help is really important, Grafman says. Try to keep things casual at the start of a relationship to make sure no one gets hurt. Is your impression correct? Of course, it depends on how we define "love." Unfortunately, our concept of love is often limited by the idea of being "in love" with another person, with butterflies in our. But with these proven breathing exercises, you can lower your anxiety and stress. To figure out if you genuinely like someone, think about how you feel when youre around them. Extroverts, on the other hand, may see introverts as quiet, nerdy, insecure, and socially inept. These individuals could help you talk to your parents and/ or put you in contact with resources to help. Again, this may stem from feeling undeserving of another's support. Consequently, the frustration caused by the actions of extroverts can build up over time. Are You an Introvert, a Highly Sensitive Person, or Both? Reframing and retraining your psychological reactance will take time, but with practice, discipline and deep breathes, you can start letting go of your ego and begin to better understand yourself and the world around you. Others, however, have never worked through the kinks that come with their brains psychological reactance. Why I don't include "Explain Why" in Questions - Byrdseed It may sound exhausting pointless, even. Why do Las Vegas natives seem to dislike Las Vegas so much? - Quora Whats for lunch? sort of way. This doesnt need to be anything complex. Discussions like these can take time, and awareness can grow gradually. I've always had troubled explaining why I like or want certain things, I usually just say "I like it" or "it's cool I guess" even though said thing could be one of my favourite thing ever. TheTrueMadgenta 4 mo. There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. If you want to learn about ways to see if you're compatible, such as comparing your values, keep reading! If you are the sole parent, its okay to say, I want to be there for you more than I am able to right now. And you may or may not feel comfortable sharing your feelings with the people around you. Its still something I struggle with from time to time, but Im more confident in my abilities.. Whats the Difference Between Body Positivity and Body Neutrality? Yet it's more common than you might think. Alright, so youve decided that you absolutely need to chime in with some added clarification about what exactly caused you to come up short. It affects peoples ability to process and identify emotions at a cognitive level, their ability to express feelings in words and their ability to recognize and understand other peoples emotions. No one, not even your therapist, knows more about your experience with depression than you do. You want to make sure that they know the real you, not a show that you put on. Explaining depression isnt easy. And look out the window at the horizon for the last 12 minutes or so, so you don't feel nauseous. It might be annoying to put on sunscreen, but youll be glad that you did when you dont have a scalding sunburn. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. After all, whats even better than someone whos willing to acknowledge his mistakes? Mental health stigma and communication and their intersections with education. 9 Reasons Why People Misunderstand You - And What To Do About It - Forbes Participation Protection Subsistence. Alexithymia, not being able to express feelings or understand other people's emotions, can have a huge emotional impact. Without subsequent meetings,. Most of us love to learn but we can absorb only so much at a time. Coach for Creative Leaders and Entrepreneurs, We all listen (and are heard) through powerful, filters which color our listening, says coach, Remy Blumenfeld. The U.S. News Health team delivers accurate information about health, nutrition and fitness, as well as in-depth medical condition guides. Do You Have a Fear of Intimacy? - Verywell Mind Villatoro AP, et al. Feeling tired, worn down, and wrung out are common symptoms of depression. It can be debilitating when it comes to social behavior, says Jordan Grafman, director of brain injury research at the Shirley Ryan AbilityLab and a professor of physical medicine and rehabilitation, neurology and psychiatry at Northwestern University in Chicago. Like Pollocks dripping, staining was another cutting-edge technique of the time. How to Explain Depression - Healthline Find out how to manage these common mental health conditions and improve your quality of life. A person who forms a negative impression of another will be less inclined to meet that person a second time, because that person has been judged in a negative light. You can say something like, "I'm really not ready to discuss this with you right now," or "I'm sorry you . What Is the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale? The Truth Behind a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy, Living With PTSD? When we feel a powerful surge of resistance, its usually us trying to protect our ego because we dont want to look vulnerable., Retraining your brain and managing your emotions takes discipline and practice. Your dads mirrored aviators could easily pick up the suns orange glow and to your boss, in his bronzed ray-bans, your white shirt would seem cream. Describing why you like something or someone can also help, anything is welcome. Sometimes, it can be difficult to tell the difference between liking someone and liking the idea of being with them. And although the idea of rebelling against authority or rules is not new, the coronavirus pandemic has given it a modern, urgent twist. For each piece: 4. All rights reserved. Behind every action, there is a hunger to meet needs. When we communicate verbally with diverse people were often surprised that, somehow they didnt hear what we thought wed said. Instead, what I mean by move on, is that you should be prepared to share exactly how youll move on from this experience. Why can't I understand things easily? People explain simple - Quora It's your brain's reaction when you feel a threat to your freedom or think your choices are being limited. Some said depression led to communication problems. Ask Your Listener To Repeat Back To You What They Think They Heard. Try not to get too upset about the person you like being around other people because theyre probably thinking of you! Studies show it can actually improve your level of depression. Were being told to wear a face mask, practice social distancing and stay at home. Achterbergh L, et al. Possibly elaborate on why your relationship (as coworkers, room-mates, siblings, neighbours or whatever) requires you to understand this about them. Toddlers are told not to throw the ball in the house, but they do it again anyway. Things didnt go according to plan, and you werent able to deliver what was expected of youfor whatever reason. (2017). The Scoop With Mufti Menk #GTVBreakfast #GBC88 #GTVBreakfast Loneliness pervades our society and threatens both our mental and physical health, but there are ways to counteract those feelings and replace them with happiness. Statistics and infographics might also be useful. You can also turn to videos online in which people explain what it feels like to experience depression. So I was wondering if you guys got any tips? As adults, its important to recognize when our rebellious self is acting out in a way thats not in our best interest or if it might be harmful to those around us, says Ehrman. Try again The friendlier part of Reddit. Older children and teens, on the other hand, may have questions. VDOM DHTML tml>. Instead, try to focus on the bigger picture (pun intended). Andrew Lichtenstein/Corbis via Getty Images Attraction is notoriously difficult to understand. Divide the explanation into a series of smaller, simpler pieces. While jealousy can sometimes be healthy, it can quickly become a way to control your partner. If youre questioning your feelings about them, try to be respectful of their feelings and dont lead them on by promising a relationship. Whats more, he believes that more effective communication isnt limited to the sciences. If you touch them and they seem uncomfortable, its a good sign that they arent ready for a relationship. At random times, the clock in the top left of my screen appears to have a coloured shape around it, which usually only happens during phone calls. You may also want to think about how youll take care of yourself if the conversation doesnt go as planned. You can go out at 3 am on a weekday and find something to do just as easily as you can f. Introverts think before they speak and often pause between thoughts to plan the next thing they want to say. When youre the speaker, there are things you can do to improve this, says Walliman. This article has been viewed 3,126,834 times. If youre falling into that latter camp, then its not really an explanation youre looking to provideyoure still only trying to avoid responsibility. When you start to feel threatened by someone asking you to do something, observe your emotions first. But if the job of explaining your symptoms and answering questions feels like a burden, you can ask for help. If youre not, you might prefer to offer your relatives a chance to speak to someone on your clinical team.. Let's cut the crap. Is there something concrete you want others to do or not do?

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why can't i explain why i like someone

why can't i explain why i like someone